Category Archives: Creating Conscious Connections

27May/11

Absence Makes the Heart Grow Fonder.

Homeward bound.

Sitting on a train last weekend, I had a lovely moment.  I’d just spent a weekend in Manchester with my cousin Ana, and I was looking forward to a peaceful journey home to see my husband and children.  As I watched the beautiful English countryside whizz by I slowly felt my heart fill with joy. Ana and I had spent most of the weekend chatting, eating and doing a bit of shopping. We’re close but don’t see each other much, so having nearly 48 hours to catch up was a luxury. It was nice for me to get out of the family routine for the weekend too. I went to bed late, could be relaxed about timings, had no children demanding things of me, didn’t have to tidy up (Ana wouldn’t let me) and slept in till 10 both mornings. We savoured patisserie cakes, Brazilian tapas, cocktails, and a proper English fry up. As a mum, it felt so good to step out of my everyday role, and remember what its like to just be me.
 
As I travelled home, my thoughts returned to my children and I looked forward to hugging them, hearing how their weekend had gone, and settling back into family life again. I felt lovingly grateful and appreciative of my husband who eagerly took on the job of looking after the kids all weekend. I expect that he should be able to and happy to do that, but before I went I thought grateful thoughts about him doing it. Now I feel my gratitude in my heart. It all reinforces the old cliche….absence makes the heart grow fonder.
 
I also think it’s about stimulating the brain by experiencing novelty, getting out of the regular routine, and recharging my sense of self. This is especially important for parents I think. Personally I came back feeling renewed, re-energised, reconnected with my cousin and my family, and an all round happier person.      
21Mar/11

Life is a Gift.

My proud husband with no. 3.

My first nephew, Dylan, was born yesterday morning and I was able to watch a short video of the precious bundle less than 12 hours after his birth, courtesy of Facebook.  And seeing his mother gently stroke his check conveyed so much more than a simple photo would. I could almost feel him and smell him myself, so strongly was I reminded of my own three newborns.  They are truly such miracles of nature, and a reminder in the busyness of daily life to treasure more of the wonders that we live through – but don’t always notice -everyday.

19Jan/11

Be Open and your Prayer will be Answered.

So let me tell you a little story. This happened to me last week.

After staying for a couple of days at my Grandparent’s house – without my family – I was starting the 3 hour journey home. My Grandpa had a plumbing bill to pay which I decided to hand deliver on my way home. In the 3 minutes from my Grandparents house to where the plumber lived I became concerned by a funny noise coming from underneath the car. It sounded like something had come unscrewed and was bouncing around on it’s one remaining fixture, and would soon result in a fatal crash on the M40. I didn’t particularly want to call the AA and hang around for ages, but who else could I get to check the engine. It’s one of those situations when you think, its probably all fine, but what if it isn’t and I’m choosing to risk a motherless future for my children.

I parked in a quiet residential road where the plumber lived and being brave and open (see previous post), rang on the doorbell (no cowardly putting through the letterbox for me this year) and had a simple, pleasant conversation with said plumber. All good, and smugly proud of my new experiance and connection, I returned to the car. After having a very speedy look under the car to see if anything was hanging off – it wasn’t – I rang my husband. I know, not heroic, but hey, he thinks on his feet better than me. So he said why don’t you have a look under the bonnet and check nothing is falling off. Now, obviously this thought had occured to me too, but I hadn’t done it because I didn’t want to draw attention to myself. People might look out of their windows and see me. And, horror of horrors, they might even open their doors, walk out and try to talk to me. They might even ask if they can help. Which would be a disaster.

But I know rationally that opening the bonnet is the only way to go. With my phone in my hand, relaying what I’m doing to my husband, I check and wobble things as if I know what I’m doing and conclude that nothing looks too dangerous.

And then it happens. A door opens. Oh my God. A man walks out, he is 10 metres away from me. My whole body is urging me to turn my head, ignore him (I am on the phone after all) get in my car and pretend that I haven’t seen him. (I know, pathetic, and actually quite wierd). But in an instant I remember my New Year’s Resolution to be open to new situations and connections. So I turn and face him, open to his approach, and it feels like my power steering has been turned off, its such an effort. And then he says,

‘Hi, is everything ok? Can I help? I’m a mechanic’

And I smile and say thank you and everything is ok again.